fridays

Four weeks ago today we met our son, Jackson Christopher - it is crazy - I'm looking at the clock right now and realizing that exactly four weeks ago I laid eyes on my son! In some ways it seems like the time has gone by rapidly and in other ways it seems as though time stopped on October 10th!!! I was thinking last night how everyone looks forward to Fridays - they have taken on a whole new meaning for me . . . a day which is a reminder of my son - not that every other day isn't a reminder, but for the past four weeks, without fail my eyes have gone to the clock right around this time - I don't know why, but they have! I go back to that room in the hospital, I see my baby boy lying in the bassinet where my two daughters once laid kicking and flailing around - he was still, he was perfect, but he was still.

This week has been more difficult than others, I don't know exactly why, but it has. I've found myself weeping and can't exactly put my finger on the reason, I just know that my heart aches for my little boy! And just the time I start to get sad my sweet girls do something so silly and funny that my tears of sadness turn to tears of joy! Over and over I praise God that He gave me two beautifully healthy girls to ease my heart just a bit, to make me laugh, to hug and kiss! They are truly a blessing beyond words!!!

I know my heart aches and yet, I can't begin to imagine what our friends The Kostjuks are going through right now - tomorrow will be a celebration of their sweet Reese's life - last week she went home to be with Jesus! She got the best birthday present ever - to be in the arms of God!!! Please pray for them and their families as the service is tomorrow morning. We rejoice with them that Reese is looking upon the face of God and that she is perfect and healthy, but we hurt with them as no parent ever wants to say goodbye to their baby!!!

amazed

I am thoroughly speechless! I mentioned our friends, the Kostjuks, who are going through so much since the birth of their little bitty Reese just last week - they are such an encouragement to me and an unbelievable testimony to all around them of Our Lord and Saviour. My mom ran into Ashley's mom, Teri, yesterday and at that point they were planning to take Reese off of all the machines, then this morning I read their blog and it sounds like they got a bit of good news - read their blog to get it all. The point of this entry is their attitude. God promises to His children (that is the key - the promise is to those who have asked Jesus into their hearts and asked Him to be the Lord of their lives - the promises in scripture only apply to those who live by the scripture) that He will never give us more than we can handle and here are Todd and Ashley going through what must be the most agonizing week of their life and they are praising God for all that He has done and recognizing that any miracle that happens is only because of God! I would love to say that if Flavio and I were faced with the same trial our attitudes would be the same and our faith would be stronger, but I don't know and I pray that I don't have to find out.

Oh, to have such faith! They are living out James 1:2-4 "Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." Naturally, God is not suggesting that we are rejoicing in the fact that little Reese is fighting for her life - rather we rejoice in the fact that God is at work and that there is nothing we can do apart from trusting in Him. He is, afterall, the Great Physician.

Pray for them as often as you think of them. They, I am sure, appreciate all of the prayers. We don't know why God has allowed this trial in their lives, but we do know, for certain, that He is in control.
To God be the Glory!!!